"...You can change. Wrap your mistakes in a cocoon and let them die, and emerge a butterfly..." -efy 2009 song

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Utah eats people....

I'm dead serious. Hear me out on this one!! So, my dear friend Nina and I have OFFICIALLY came to the dreadful conclusion that UTAH EATS OUR FRIENDS!!! I'm tellin' ya, its TRUE!! It all started with....ummm....I don't exactly remember when it started. That's just how awfully horrific this matter is. As far as I remember, a lot of my friends started going to college, most of them to BYU (which is indeed found in the pleasant, yet dreadful state of Utah). Then, before I knew it the MTC (also located in Utah) began devouring some of the guys I like to call my friends. It even ate my adored brother! *sniff, sniff* 'Twas a sad, sad day indeed. Now, my dear friend Kallie and her family are moving to Utah. Will Utah's hunger ever be satisfied? Or will this painful ravaging never cease?
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12 comments:

  1. MeggieNovember 10, 2010 at 10:02 AM

    Oh my goodness! I feel the same way! It seems all of my friends are moving to Utah! So me and my sister have desided to never live there, for we think if we do... we will never come out!

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  2. Nina!November 10, 2010 at 2:25 PM

    Haha, I'm sure we'll ALL end up there eventually.

    And the weird thing is, almost half the people I know are FROM Utah. Now they're all going back. :P

    And I think it started with Julie. She was the first of us to leave for college, wasn't she?

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  3. SarahNovember 10, 2010 at 5:33 PM

    Just wait till Zion is established. Then THAT place will be eating your friends...and hopefully you too! ;)

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  4. AmbryNovember 10, 2010 at 6:33 PM

    Ya I think Julie just might have been the first to be eaten. I'm actually hoping I get eaten next year...we'll see!!! I sure hope Zion eats me! Otherwise I will be a very sad person. ;)

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  5. Julie BickmoreNovember 10, 2010 at 8:00 PM

    So tell me, once they are eaten, where do they go? Does UT have a digestive system?

    xoxo

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  6. AmbryNovember 10, 2010 at 8:20 PM

    Well, you see...It's all very complex. I'm not finished with the investigation of the matter. As far as I can predict, the person(s) who have been digested can later be, well, undigested upon specific request. I'll let you know if I find any other evidence!! haha! =D

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  7. Steve TNovember 11, 2010 at 9:41 PM

    Okay, so Utah is starving and hungry for good, down-to-earth folks, just like the ones we associate with—our loved ones, friends, family, and general mormybuddies. (Did I just coin a new word?—how coolish is that! Oh, I just can’t stop!) The good news is that some of 'em get regurgitated somewhere else! (Wow, I just had a Jonah/whale moment.) Anyhow, back to the regurgitation of our beloved ones. Well . . . uh . . . hmmm . . . this brain-train just derailed. cyaltr 

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  8. LaraNovember 12, 2010 at 10:30 PM

    Well, in 10 months (NOT that I'm counting down or anything preposterous like that) I will join your list of "Friends Eaten By The State Of Utah."
    Sorry, but it's a really good school. And SO cheap!

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  9. MeggieNovember 13, 2010 at 10:01 AM

    WHOA! You are going to UT?! :O When did this happen? Why am I left out of knowing these important things?

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  10. ReneeNovember 15, 2010 at 8:20 AM

    Utah doesn't eat people, it turn them into green jello that gets dropped of at the various members and investigators homes. "Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!" Sorry, totally outdated movie reference. Ugh.
    -Sis Fitz

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  11. MeggieNovember 15, 2010 at 6:25 PM

    So wait, what you're saying is every Christmas that green jello that I LOVE is..... o_o oh no.

    I know that quote! I think I heard it on Glenn Beck.

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  12. AmbryNovember 16, 2010 at 4:50 PM

    Haha! Dang, I used to enjoy green jello. Now it will never be the same. :)

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